Archive for November, 2010

Snow

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , on November 30, 2010 by abandonata

Snow in the Slough again. This all started with snow. Everything has always started and ended with snow.

I expected snow would mix with the mud of the slough in hideous slush this winter, hard to drag feet through. But snow blankets the Slough with beauty, hides the ruts, hummocks and treacherous pits.

I am suffering from terminal naivety, still trusting in the smooth surface, wanting to believe honesty exists. Naivety is the word for trust in the real world.

Exiled

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , on November 25, 2010 by abandonata

I am exiled from my own life, from myself. Cut adrift, not allowed home, home gone.

Armenian.

Wave-particle duality

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , on November 20, 2010 by abandonata

Where I saw waves, he saw particles.

They are two aspects of the same thing – you see what you look for. Ask Niels Bohr.

And so events are what you make them with hindsight, not what they were intended at the time? The Ministry of Truth has spoken.

All for nothing, and nothing for all

Posted in Uncategorized with tags on November 15, 2010 by abandonata

Bit late for a U-turn, bint. Waaaaay too late.

‘There is a tide in the affairs of men.
Which, taken at the flood, leads on to fortune;
Omitted, all the voyage of their life
Is bound in shallows and in miseries.’

I’ll be in the shallows, then.

Interregnum

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , on November 9, 2010 by abandonata

An interregnum, like many things, can only be defined in retrospect. When the first ruler is dead, and there is no heir apparent, you don’t know whether it is the end of the monarchy – time for a republic – or whether there is a new king waiting in the wings. Or a Protectorate.

Perhaps I need a protector.

Tightrope

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , on November 6, 2010 by abandonata

Venetian acrobats walked a tightrope stretched between the Doge’s Palace and the Campanile. Did people watch to see them walk or see them fall?

My tightrope is breaking, strand by strand. Some were cut through, some just snapped under the strain. How many are left? How many will hold? Any? Enough? Should I just jump now?

Larkin’s rabbit

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , on November 3, 2010 by abandonata

Caught in the center of a soundless field
While hot inexplicable hours go by
What trap is this? Where were its teeth concealed?

….

You may have thought things would come right again
If you could only keep quite still and wait.